Saturday, January 27, 2007

(In)Fidel Castro, Censorship Maestro

So, my fellow comrade and infidel from the good ol' Cowmmunist times, Castor (or Castro as the bitter man calls himself now) is probably on his deathbed, even as I flourish in my 90s. People ask me, WHAT is the secret to your longevity, to your sexual prowess, and I tell them to go follow the teachings of the late Cowsho Rajneesh, to read those great books by him, and listen to those fantastic lectures, and finally, watch those sexy movies of Cowsho and Western women in Indian Ashrams, practising the ultimate in Tantric sex. Cowsho inspired me to develop my populist shogun slogan:
When you are free
Even urine is ghee.
With all due respect to cousin Moorarji Desai, who actually thought urine was ghee and duly peed on his chappati/roti/naan to "save our country butter" when his goal should have been to "serve our country better". And that's how Operation Flood and Amul originated. And had record production, because the Prime Min-Pisster didn't steal half of their produce/products.

Anyway, we're a Bollywood blog, not realpolitricking Machiavelli's-in-the-making. We've covered that base back when we were toddlers. These days, we focus our energies on issues of great consequence to the world, such as Bollywood plagiarism, Bollywood goof-ups, Bollywood wannabes, Bollywood gossip and the like. Keyword density and search engine optimization, I bow down to thine power.

So yeah, after all those red herrings, back to the issue on hand. Scentsorship. Should we allow smelly Indian-hating Indians like myself into Bollywood parties? Should we drag them to the supermarket and show them the deodorant aisle? Or should we show them the whore door? Just kidding. You wouldn't wanna turn me away, would you? Or you'd end up on this vengeful blog, reincarnated as a...hold your breath, champ... stooge. OOO. Scary.

Indian censorship boss, Sharmila Tagore back when she was a young tart

Censorship is great. What other excuse could someone like Sharmila TheWhoreTagore come up with to gag someone who's sexier and smarter than her, or, alternatively, someone who has an inherent hatred for her? Sharmila, you've been an able student. Infidel Cowstro and I are proud of you.

3 comments:

PolkaStripes-ZebraDots said...

Hey - Totally love your blog! check mine out, it's a satire on Bollywood!


http://polkastripeszebradots.blogspot.com/

We should link to eachother! Let me know what you think of my blog! You from aussie?

X said...

hey pszd, great blog guys. love it. you guys have some really kitschy pics on there - great work the commentary too. cheers.

Doddi Buddhi said...

CTT

You have a fan! You are terrific...

Never again will I eat Ghee when I am 'free'

DB