Sunday, December 30, 2007

Shoaib Fagthar and Shah Rukh Khan Profess Their Undying Love...

Righto, so, what have we here? Shoaib Akhtar, Porkistani cricketer, and erstwhile heterosexual playboy now likes the boys? Well, at least he didn't end up picking someone as blatantly, obviously straight as...lets see...

Shoaib Akhtar, Pakistani pace bowler is bowled over by Shah Rukh Khan, gay Bollywood superstar

You really have a death wish, don't you Shoaib? Do you realize how many cocks that ass has been exposed to? Anyway, at least Shah Rukh is finally into REAL men. Eat your heart out, Karan Johar (aka Karen Jo in Indian gay circles).

You're on the blog that asks why the chant "I'm a rainbow too" hasn't caught on in the gay community as a coming-out catch-phrase!?!

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Nach Baliye - We Are Not Dancing With The Sitars

Most of my reading these days involves Sun Tzu, The Callgirls Toplist and the like, because y'know, I'm a macho, globe-trotting corporate warrior and shit. Anyway, so I ended up clicking this link to an article about "Nach Baliye", from one of the feeds on this blog, and behold! I am now one of the lucky few who have been exposed to the wonders of this "Dancing With The Stars" themed show, with fabulous dance routines and costumes that make the most flamboyant of drag queens seem like Mother Teresa.

Rakhi Sawant's partner has better makeup skills than her

Rakhi Sawant might not be great at her makeup, but her partner sure has learnt a few tricks off her. And, I am greatly distressed here - Rakhi is CLOTHED! That's bullshit man. I want my money back.

Closeted Bollywood bisexual actress staring at another chick's boobs

Y'know, men get a bad name for being obsessed with boobs. What about chicks who stare at other chicks' boobies? No, that's so moral. I agree. There's nothing hotter than a hot chick that likes chicks. Long live dusky, pretty Bollywood lesbians.

Classy Bollywood starlet spreads her legs in public
The dignified lady in red seems to be asking something of the Caucasian gentleman to her right...

Yes, that's Salman Khan at the extreme right. He seems to have been watching a lot of Scrubs, since he's started calling all these new kids girlie names. I don't know or care who the other two turds are. What I do care about is the new Speed Racer movie, which is out in 2008. Woohoo! What can I say about the costumes? The guy's wearing a shiny, satin pair of trackpants, with a shiny silver stripe for heaven's sake.

Indian Christmas Attire?

I bet you didn't realize currypuffs had Christmas costumes too. Merry Christmas, amigos.

P_Ooh_Ja Bedi, I mean, Pooja Baby
After all those eyesores, there was yummy mummy Pooja Bedi to soothe my eyes. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Doogie Likes It Doggystyle

Neil Patrick Harris as Barney in How I Met Your Mother
I've googled it, and after all these months no gossip queen has used this witty, and mind-bending (pun intended; does one even exist here?) headline. Yes, Neil Patrick Harris is gay, and I think its great. Because now I can make all those Doogie-doggy jokes I've held out on for all these decades. A burden has been lifted. Takes me back to Time Magazine's Busta Rhymes arrest report, "Busta Busted", "Busted Crimes", "Busta Crimes".

Also, it makes his role in Harold and Kumar go to Whitecastle all the more humorous. Why? 'Coz, the guy doesn't even like pussy. Ah, sarcasm, thy name be Neil Patrick Harris.John Cho, Neil Patrick Harris and Kal Penn in Harold and Kumar go to White Castle

Anyway, what did you expect after NPH was caught in compromosing positions with male castmates, such as this:

NPH from his Doogie Howser days, fondling his best friend
NPH from his Doogie Howser days, cuddling up to his best bud

Urmila Has An Eye (FOR/AND) a Timepiece

Labor-leisure theory is a farce. The more cents per hour they give me, the greater is my workload. Strategic management? What's that. Star cows - you're the cash cows - more milk, less grazing, less sleep, consistent output. Management is for Peter Drucker.

Anyhoo, we aren't here to discuss corporate philosophy and whine and bitch and moan. Instead, we are here to poke fun at Urmila Mutt-on-car's fashion sense.

I mean, what were you thinking? First, you have a "pendant" that's straight out of a Morris Day and the Time live set, and then you make a necklace out of King Kong's left eyeball? Must be "Jungle Love". HAHAHA. I crack myself up. Not. These subtle references to pop culture, which I won't even understand in a couple of months, when I visit my blog as a visitor...shame on me.

Anyway kids, as Jay and Silent Bob say, "its the Motherfucking TIME"! Merry Christmas ;-)