Monday, February 19, 2007

Anjaliji Ki Pasand (Angela G's Pick) - Arjun Ram-Balls

Ancient Chinese proverb say eco-friendly person act on poplar demand.

First things first. There's a couple of nice new Bollywood blogs that are way more active, and I hate saying, a tad funnier/respectable. *sobs*.
Do check them out. Or I'd be happy to do a feature on you. OOOoooooooOOOOooooooo.

As is cowmon (notice the rasta connection, cow-M O N, rasta MON) knowledge in Bollywood these days, His Lowness, the venereal Cow Tse Tung is, in wog parlance, a fully sick bodybuilder. Part of my fitness regime includes the intake of this super-herbal-drug (herbal drug! mmmm, salvia salivating), called Horny Goat Weed. It gives you the virility of a horny goat, and the calm demeanor of a weed-wielding hippie. Almost like Weed Willie Winkie, y'know.

So how's that linked to Bollywood, you might ask. Well, you ignoramus, son of a hippopotamus, it might shock you to know this, but former Indian supermodel, and current Bollywood actor, Arjun Ram Balls ("ram" balls, ode to horny goatweed, but of course) once trained with me at my state of the art gym. Don't believe me? He's wearing the shirt I wore to the last Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras in Saharanpur district.

Arjun Rampal - hippie or pansy? Mardi Gras, or Mardi Grass, ala` Nimbin

With a cigarette in my hand...
I felt like a man (remember the public service ad on Zee TV?)

Now, his wife, fellow former Indian supermodel, Mehr Jessia comes across as a pleasant woman generally. But, I can bet you never saw THIS side of her. Her middle name is Peta, as in PETA. I kid you not.

WTF happened to Mehr Jessia?

Yeah, when life's a bitch and so is your wife, you want to make sure you get under her skin. But since we're not skin-shedding snakes (unless you believe in bloody David Icke), we have to make do with wearing her clothes. Don't ask me to get into the nitty-gritties. Ask Arjun, the autogynephiliac (yeah, laugh at me - I had to Google the spelling).

I categorically deny wearing Mehr Jessia's tops. Yeah right, Arjun!

8 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

Reading this one post has increased my knowledge of the Indian film industry by 200%. Is there any way a gorilla could audition for a leading part? The actor in the photo looks like a gibbon with tits.

Angela G. Skylar said...

Halaramundo! Well done, Well done! :applause: Nice to see Arjun on here...excellent pic selections by the way...and an extra thanks for linking me!

X said...

ah gorilla, yer a wise 'man', if i might call you so. hey, gorillas are the only leads allowed in bollywood. need proof? watch out for our next feature on gorillas in bollywood ;-)

angela, thanks and no worries - not just for the applause/linking etc, but for leaving a suggestion. sometimes, you run out of ideas, when a good samaritan like you comes by and saves the day ;-)

PolkaStripes-ZebraDots said...

thanks for the shout out!! and right back at ya! BTW - you had to google the spelling, i had to google the meaning! "autogynephiliac" NICE!

X said...

no worries :-). ah, the queer jokes are recycle-friendly - all we need is synonyms, hence the term ;-)

Gorilla Bananas said...

I don't understand what a "sick" bodybuilder is. How about publishing a glossary of local expressions for your international readers?

Lidia said...

hehe - you can't not admit that Arjun is absolutely gorgeous though! Even in that pink flowered shirt :P
-Amy

X said...

gorilla, http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=sick . in aussie [particularly wog]slang, it stands for "cool" or "phat". i'll do a glossary henceforth - only god knows why i stopped, but good idea. shall revive it.

tohou lidia, yes, he seems to be excellent competition to a certain mr. everett, who's going to be marshalling this year's Sydney GLBT mardia gras. ;-)